Leadership and management development

Conflict management

Your leadership and management development programme needs to be centered around the six essential leadership management skills, namely the ability:

1. To set and achieve your goals.
2. To communicate clearly.
3. To manage time and prioritise, and delegate work.
4. To manage conflict and handle difficult people.
5. To create and sustain a positive mental attitude, especially during tough times.
6. To inspire others and create a positive, productive atmosphere.

If you want to know more about conflict management training, please read on................

Conflict management training

Conflict is inevitable. You are bound to get some. The reason you will get conflict is simple: not everyone shares your ideas. What you think is good, they think is no good. What you think will work, they don't think will work. What you think is the next move, they disagree and propose the opposite.

So, conflict is inevitable.

And in addition to disagreements over tactics, some people misbehave. They don't show up for the meeting on time. They swear in the wrong place. They break things because they were messing around. They don't do things according to the agreed protocols.

So again, conflict becomes inevitable.

If conflict is inevitable, then as the leader manager you need to learn to deal with it.

• You must deal with conflict within the context of you conflicting with others.
• You need to be able to deal with conflict within the context of other people falling out and fighting amongst themselves and with you acting as the peacemaker.

In both cases you need to understand, memorise and use the principles of rational conflict management.

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What are the principles of rational conflict management?

Here they are in a nutshell:

1. Remember that your primary goal is to modify their behaviour

Remember that your primary goal is to modify their behaviour - not win the argument. So don't argue for entertainment value. And don't argue in an emotional an "all guns blazing" manner. (See below notes).

2."Nip it in the bud"

When a conflict situation arises, deal with it. Don't run away and hope that the situation will get better if you don't mention it. It probably won't get better. You must step in and deal with the situation before it can grow into something more dangerous.

3.Don't use emotional language

When in conflict situations, your emotions are aroused. But don't let that mean that you use emotive and highly charged language to express your meaning. Instead of using emotive, subjective language, use objective language.

4.Use objective language

Objective language is factual, emotionalised, specific, and evidenced based language. Talk about the facts that led to your feelings. Don't talk about your feelings themselves. Talk about what the person did, or failed to do, that triggered the feelings.

Verbalise the Facts not the feelings.

5.Don't attack their self-image. (Ego or pride)

Make a distinction between the man and the performance. Criticise the performance, or the action, don't criticise the man (or woman's) personality or character.

6.Give them their clear way out of the conflict

Suggest a specific corrective action. State the behaviour change that you think would represent a logical way out of the impasse.

Ask them for a specific change in their behaviour.

Ask them if they can agree to your suggested logical way out of the impasse.

If they say yes, then that is great.

If they say no, then ask "why not?".

7. Distinguish reasons from excuses

When he answers your question, then you need to distinguish between a reason for not doing something and an excuse for not doing something.

• If he offers reasons then negotiate and give concessions.
• If he offers only excuses then don't negotiate and don't give concessions.

8. Positively reinforce any positive change in their behaviour

Give appreciation and praise to any behaviour that you would like to see repeated.

Don't allow conflicts to degenerate into emotional clashes that spoil relationships and the productivity of the team. The team must be a cohesive unit and must be able to resolve conflicts according to the principles of reason.

Additional notes on conflict:

Conflict situations tend to knock ones self-confidence and tend therefore to have a negative effect of the emotions and motivation. Conflicts tend to make leaders less motivated to come to work and less confident when there.

But of course, we need our leaders to be confident and motivated. Even during tough times, especially during tough times.

Please follow the link for details about our leadership and management development training.

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