Is the Karpman Drama Triangle Good for Resolving Conflicts?
Is the Karpman Drama Triangle Good for Resolving Conflicts?
The Karpman Drama Triangle is NOT a good method to understand how to resolve conflicts, because the method instructs us which behaviours do NOT work, rather than telling us which behaviours do work.
Models which tell us which behaviours do NOT work, are of strictly limited value.
If we learn that the right answer to a problem is NOT nine, or ten, or fifteen, then how much useful knowledge have we gained?
Not much!
The Karpman Drama Triangle gives us three behaviours, which are represented by three points forming a triangle.
We are told that the space inside the triangle represents what NOT to do because these three behaviours do NOT work.
The solutions to our conflict problems are to be found OUTSIDE The Karpman drama triangle - "Somewhere".
The Three Behaviours of the Karpman Drama Triangle.
The three behaviours of the Karpman Drama Triangle are: Victim, Rescuer, Persecutor.
1. The Victim
In conflict situations, don't act as though you are a victim of others. This only serves to weaken your self-image and lends emotional strength to others.
2. The Rescuer
In conflict situations, don't pretend to be the rescuer of victims. Maybe other people don't want to be rescued by you, because they don't have a victim mentality.
And if they DO have a victim mentality, then the arrival of the "Rescuer" reinforces victims' low opinion of themselves.
3. The Persecutor (aka Villain)
In conflicts, don't perform the role of The Persecutor (the Villain) because these terms imply a host of bad behaviours: being aggressive, threatening, oppressive authoritarian, rigid, and bullying.
If solutions to conflict problems are found only outside the Karpman drama triangle behaviours, then what positive skills sets DO we need, in order to best resolve conflicts?
The Clear, Rational, Positive Triangle.
The three correct principles that underpin the correct answers to conflict management are: Clarity, Rationality, Positivity.
1. Clarity
We manage conflicts using only clear ideas, clearly expressed. We are always able to make ourselves clearly understood.
2. Rationality
We manage conflicts according to rational principles: ie we find solutions by reference to facts, logic, objectivity, written policies and laws.
3. Positivity
Our intentions are always honourable and positive: We intend to find practical solutions that are mutually beneficial to all parties, and which represent a mutual exchange of values.
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Further Reading in Conflict Management and Handling Difficult People
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6 Step method to handle difficult people
6 step method to handle difficult people On occasion, you have to handle difficult people. But there are two major contexts in which that can occur: When you are the one who is taking the initiative to speak first. When the other person is the one who is taking the initiative...
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How to deal with a bully at work
Do you have a problem with a bully at work? Would you like to have the confidence to fight back? Follow these six simple steps to take control of the situation and defeat the bully.
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How to handle workplace conflict
Learn how to manage conflict situations logically, confidently and quickly.
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How to deal with a smelly person at work
If you have the task of telling a colleague that they smell, these are the steps you need to take.
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How to Deal with Lazy People at Work
Working with a lazy person is not only frustrating, it can also mean that you have to take on their work as well as your own. Follow these key points to get them to do their share of the work.
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