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Emotional Management

Emotional Management

Emotional Management

Emotional management is vital in achieving a quality life. Understanding the connection between thoughts, feelings, and actions is the first step in this process.

When it comes to managing our emotions, it's important to note that our thoughts and beliefs directly influence our feelings, which then affect our actions and results. In this blog, we explore how we can reduce fear and replace it with confidence by shifting our thoughts, attitudes, and focus.

To manage our emotions effectively, we need to be conscious of our thoughts and beliefs and how they shape our feelings. This consciousness is achieved by regularly questioning and analysing the content of our minds. We can ask ourselves questions such as: How have I been using my mind and emotions over the past weeks or months? What percentage of my time has been spent on fear, worry, and anxiety? How much time have I dedicated to feelings of anger, bitterness, and resentment? Conversely, how much time have I spent on thoughts and feelings of confidence, enthusiasm, optimism, and happiness?

To answer the initial question on how to reduce fear and replace it with confidence, we must understand that our attitudes significantly impact our behaviour and, consequently, the results we create. Our attitudes towards various issues and people, including ourselves, are shaped by the sum of our thoughts, feelings, and beliefs. By changing our attitudes, we can shift from a negative influence to a positive one, consequently improving our results.

This change in attitude can be visualized through two distinct cycles: the negative cycle and the positive cycle.

In the negative cycle, bad thoughts create poor emotional states, which then result in poor actions and, ultimately, bad results. This cycle tends to reinforce the original negative thoughts.

In contrast, the positive cycle begins with good thoughts, leading to resourceful emotional states, improved actions, and better results, thus reinforcing the original positive thoughts.

The theoretical optimum balance suggests that there is an ideal balance of emotions that can allow us to thrive on planet Earth, despite its uncertainties, dangers, and opportunities. The aim is to find the right balance between fear and confidence, anger and calm, nostalgia and focus on the present and future.

To shift our focus from the negative to the positive, we need to change the content of our mind and thoughts. When our mind is focused on the future being bad, we experience feelings of worry, fear, anxiety, stress, and loss of confidence. However, when our mind is focused on the future being good, we experience optimism, confidence, more energy, ambition, desire, enthusiasm, motivation, and happiness.

Similarly, when our mind is focused on the past being bad, we experience feelings of bitterness, anger, resentment, revenge, sorrow, embarrassment, guilt, and regret.

In contrast, when our mind is focused on the past being good, we experience nostalgia and a wish to return to the "good old days."

To help others shift their focus towards a better future, we can ask a series of leading questions, such as:

  1. What are your goals for a better future?
  2. What has been going well, easily, or is good?
  3. What has not been going so well lately?
  4. Based on your analysis of what has NOT been going so well, what adaptive changes do you think we should/could make to our current plans or actions to get back on track towards our goal?
  5. What ideas do you have for continuous improvement?
  6. What are your written plans that describe how you intend to achieve your goals?
  7. In relation to achieving your goals and plans, what are your top three priority actions?

By actively managing our thoughts and emotions, we can gain greater control over our lives, ultimately replacing fear with confidence and creating a brighter future.

About the Author: Chris Farmer


Chris Farmer is the founder of the Corporate Coach Group and has many years’ experience in training leaders and managers, in both the public and private sectors, to achieve their organisational goals, especially during tough economic times. He is also well aware of the disciplines and problems associated with running a business.

Over the years, Chris has designed and delivered thousands of training programmes and has coached and motivated many management teams, groups and individuals. His training programmes are both structured and clear, designed to help delegates organise their thinking and, wherever necessary, to improve their techniques and skills.

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