Ten Ways to Improve your Body Language
10 Ways To Improve Your Body Language
You communicate primarily by means of four different channels:
- Spoken language.
- Written language.
- Voice tones.
- Body language.
Body language is an important component of your total communication. The body language component of your communication carries a lot of information.
Good body language is the act of making a positive impression in the minds of others by the proper use of your appearance, dress-code and gestures.
How you look at any given moment is a major component of your communication.
If you want to improve your communication, then strive to improve your understanding of body language.
How can you improve your understanding of body language?
You can improve your understanding of body language by recognising that your body language is not one thing, but is composed of many subset elements.
The subset elements of body language are as follows.
- Body posture.
- Dress code.
- The amount and the way that you touch other people.
- Facial expression.
- Eye contact.
- Hand and arm gestures.
- Orientation.
- Proximity.
- Scent.
- Accessories.
1. Your body posture
Your body posture means, in effect, how you use your spine. Do you stand and sit up straight, or do you tend to slouch? Generally, don't slouch. Instead, try to sit or stand up straight. It is good for the spine to keep its natural shape, and it looks better.
Don't slouch. It is bad for the back and makes you look lazy.
2. Your dress code
How you dress is important. But how you dress is contextual. It is impossible to give advice on exactly how you would dress because the context changes. If the context is "on the farm" then you should dress for being on the farm. If the context is "in a business meeting", then you should dress for a business meeting. But the point is, if you are going to a business meeting at the bank, then don't go in your wellies.
Dress in such a manner that is likely to create a positive emotional response in the minds of the other people, in that context. Dress so that you are "functionally tidy".
3. Touch
The amount and the way that you touch other people. This includes your handshake. Give firm, brief and dry handshakes. Don't give long duration, wet and limp handshakes.
4. Facial expression
Every face tells a story. In general, the best thing to do is to try to smile; especially when you are meeting someone.
Smile on meeting and smile on departing.
Smile; and the world smiles with you.
Don't spend your whole day frowning. It makes you look as if everything is going wrong and therefore that you are ineffective and lacking in confidence.
Look carefully at people like Richard Branson and you will find he smiles a lot.
5. Eye contact
The eyes are the windows to the soul.
My advice for eye contact is this:
Give other people the same amount of eye contact that they are giving to you.
If the other person is looking into your eyes, then hold his eye contact.
If the other person tends to avoid eye contact with you, then don't stare at them.
6. Hand and arm gestures
In relation to hand and arm gestures, here is my advice:
NEVER point at people.
Don't point your finger. Don't point your pen.
Pointing is the most common error in hand gestures.
Keep your hands down, and under the eye line.
Use an open hand, palms down, and open fingers hand gesture with which to gesticulate.
7. Orientation
The orientation is the angle at which you stand or sit relative to the other person. Here is the advice: Don't stand or sit square on to the other person.
Position yourself so that you are slightly at an angle.
Square on orientation is aggressive, or sexually suggestive, depending on the context.
In work, keep an angle of about 45 degrees.
8. Proximity
Proximity refers to how close or how far away you are.
The advice here is to NOT invade the others space. (Unless the context is a in a lift or on the tube, etc.).
Don't get too close.
Generally keep at least one arm's length away from others.
If you come in too close you will come across as being creepy. Or aggressive. Or intimidating. Or sexually suggestive.
When at work, literally, keep your distance.
9. Scent
Scent refers to how you smell. The advice is either don't smell at all, or make sure you smell pleasant.
Body odour or bad breath is a a really turn-off. As is smelling of cigarettes.
Even wearing too much perfume can be a bad thing.
Pay attention to scent, because it could cost you, if you get it wrong.
10. Accessories
An accessory refers to your belongings: the phone you have, the car you drive, the quality of the laptop you have.
If your belongings are of good quality and in good order, that says something about you.
If they are broken and dirty, that says something else.
Try to have your belongings as good as you can make them.
Subliminal messages
Most body language messages are subliminal; meaning that most body language messages operate at a level below conscious awareness.
That is why you don't think much about your body language. And it is also why you should.
Don't let your subliminal messages be negative.
Make your subliminal body language messages positive.
Strive to have:
- A good, straight body posture.
- A functional and tidy dress code.
- A firm, brief and dry handshake.
- Happy facial expression.
- Sufficient and direct eye contact.
- Expressive hand and arm gestures (but no pointing).
- A 45 degree orientation.
- Not too close proximity.
- A nice scent.
- Tidy and clean accessories that are in good order.
If you did all that, then you would make the right impression.
About the Author: Chris Farmer
Chris Farmer is the founder of the Corporate Coach Group and has many years’ experience in training leaders and managers, in both the public and private sectors, to achieve their organisational goals, especially during tough economic times. He is also well aware of the disciplines and problems associated with running a business.
Over the years, Chris has designed and delivered thousands of training programmes and has coached and motivated many management teams, groups and individuals. His training programmes are both structured and clear, designed to help delegates organise their thinking and, wherever necessary, to improve their techniques and skills.
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