Do you Make Any of These Communication Mistakes?
Do You Make Any of These Communication Mistakes?
There are six common mistakes people make in their communication styles. Do you do have any of the following bad habits?
- Talking too much about yourself.
- Not trying to understand what the other person really means.
- Forgetting most of what you hear.
- Bad language or speech habits.
- Poor voice tonality.
- Poor body language.
1. Talking too much about yourself.
Most people are egocentric, so they like to talk about themselves, what interests them, and what is happening to them.
Most people recognise, that in any conversation, there should be a balance between the various parties, where each one has a fair share of the air time.
Sadly, there are some people who don't understand this unspoken rule, and they hog the limelight.
They mistakenly believe that their role is to do all the talking.
They forget that the art of being a good conversationalist, is to direct the conversation onto topics that are of interest to their listeners.
Therefore, don't talk too much about yourself and what only interests you. Instead, ask more questions and have the other person share the conversational limelight.
2. Not trying to understand what the other person really means.
When the other person speaks, many people listen with an intention to refute, or rebut, or argue.
In many situations it is okay to refute what the other is saying. BUT in many other situations, it is better NOT to instantly try to answer, but instead, to strive to understand what they are saying and WHY they are saying it.
You may not agree with many people, but you should try to understand all of them.
Note the difference between agreement and understanding.
Don't try to refute people, try to understand them.
3. Forgetting most of what you hear.
Many people forget most of what they hear. It could be because they are not really paying attention to what is being said, or they do not try to remember what the person is saying.
The solution to this problem is easy:
Pay attention to what the other person is saying. The best way to do that is to try to visualise their message. If you cannot visualise their message, then ask the person questions until you do have enough information to form a visual image of their message.
Once you have a visual image in mind, then try to commit it to memory.
Do that simply by concentrating on the image and burn it into your short-term memory.
Please note that developing the habit of mental visualisation will help improve both your understanding and your memory.
4.Bad language or speech habits.
The next most common bad habit is bad language. That means swearing, unnecessary profanities, and careless or hurtful comments.
It would pay you to err on the side of caution, when it comes to your use of language.
If in doubt, leave it out.
Don't use insensitive or insulting language.
Instead, use eloquent, sensitive and encouraging language.
5. Poor voice tonality.
It is not only what you say that is important, HOW you say it, will make a big difference.
People respond to your voice tones, instinctively.
It is important to have a voice that is pleasant to listen to.
Therefore, do not be too loud, too shrill, too fast, or monotone. Try to speak not too loud, slightly deeper, slightly slower, and with more variable tones.
6 Poor body language.
How you look, is as important as what you say. Body language means how you use your face, hands, gestures, eye contact and dress code.
The errors are: bored facial expression, pointy fingers, aggressive arm gestures, too much or too little eye contact, and inappropriate dress code.
The corrections are happy, or relaxed facial expressions. Hands down below the eye line, Moderate eye contact, and dress slightly smarter than the expected average.
About the Author: Chris Farmer
Chris Farmer is the founder of the Corporate Coach Group and has many years’ experience in training leaders and managers, in both the public and private sectors, to achieve their organisational goals, especially during tough economic times. He is also well aware of the disciplines and problems associated with running a business.
Over the years, Chris has designed and delivered thousands of training programmes and has coached and motivated many management teams, groups and individuals. His training programmes are both structured and clear, designed to help delegates organise their thinking and, wherever necessary, to improve their techniques and skills.
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