How to Stop Worrying
How to Stop Worrying
Here is a good motto:
"Remember, it is foolish to fret and worry. Instead, identify the problem, Formulate your best plan, Then overwhelm your troubles with intelligent action".
Many people spend too much valuable time, fretting and worrying.
They spend too much time fretting and worrying over things which have happened, in the past; may yet happen, in the future; and even over things which they have no power to change. Fretting and worrying doesn't change anything other than your emotional state.
Fretting and worrying makes you feel worse, and yet it does nothing to improve the situation. So that is why we write, 'Remember, it is foolish to fret and worry'.
Don't fret and worry, instead identify the problem
In order to solve a problem, it is first necessary to identify its exact nature. The problem can be defined as the way to get yourself from "the actual state of affairs" to "the desired state of affairs".
As a problem solver, your mission is to find ways to fill-in the middle ground between the two states, to build a bridge that will allow you to get from your actual state of affairs to your desired state of affairs.
And to do that you must understand: exactly what is your current condition and what is your desired state.
And once you know that, you can start to fill in the middle ground with a plan of action.
Measure the actual state of affairs
If you want to lose weight, you need to know exactly how heavy you are now.
If you want to increase your wealth, then you need to draw up a financial statement that tells you your current net-worth.
If you want to improve yourself, in any realm, then your first step is to look at yourself honestly and judge your current condition.
This act of measuring your current condition is sometimes emotionally painful. But you need to know your current status.
Define the desired state of affairs
The next step is to decide what your desired state is. What do you want. Write down exactly, what your desired state is. If possible, ascribe a set of numbers to the goal.
- If you want to be richer, then how rich is that? Put a number on it.
- If you want to be faster, then how fast is that? Put a number on it.
- If you want to be better, then how much better? Put a number on it, if possible.
If it is not possible to put a number on the goal, then describe the goal in words, or draw a diagram or a picture of it. You need to really understand at a deep level what you will accept as a successful outcome.
If you don't know what you will accept as "success", you won't know when you have achieved it.
Fill in the problem space
In order to know what the problem space is, you may need to answer this question.
What are the three major causes of the problem?
Let us assume that all problems have causes, and that most problems have more than one cause. Let us assume that your problem has at least three causes. Write down the three main causes.
For each cause, there are at least two or more solutions. Write down the six solutions suggested by the three causes.
When you have a list of six possible solutions, pick the best selection and make that the basis of your plan of action. Next,
Formulate your best plan, then overwhelm your troubles with intelligent action
Once you have your plan, then immediately, swing into action!
Don't wait; Don't worry; Don't wonder if it will work or not; Instead, test it.
Test the plan and you will see if it works or not
The truth will probably be that your plan will partially work.
You'll make some progress, but not as much as you hoped. So then you reiterate the process.
If you don't make as much progress as you had hoped, then, re-formulate your best plan, and continue to then overwhelm your troubles with even more intelligent action.
Overwhelm your troubles with intelligent action
Rather than feeling overwhelmed BY your troubles, you should instead OVERWHELM your troubles.
Most problems are solvable
Remember, most problems are solvable; but only if you correctly apply the correct actions, taken in the correct order.
So, in order to achieve the desired result, you need to think it through, step by step.
Think through your problem, step by step
Take only informed, intelligent action. Intelligent action is gained only through intelligent thought. It is not gained through fretting and worrying.
So remember...
It is foolish to fret and worry.
Instead, identify the problem,
Formulate your best plan,
Then overwhelm your troubles with intelligent action.
In order to improve your performance, you may need to develop your personal and professional skills: meaning: skills of communication, planning, prioritisation, motivation and personal confidence. If you want to learn more, then click here for personal development training.
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About the Author: Chris Farmer
Chris Farmer is the founder of the Corporate Coach Group and has many years’ experience in training leaders and managers, in both the public and private sectors, to achieve their organisational goals, especially during tough economic times. He is also well aware of the disciplines and problems associated with running a business.
Over the years, Chris has designed and delivered thousands of training programmes and has coached and motivated many management teams, groups and individuals. His training programmes are both structured and clear, designed to help delegates organise their thinking and, wherever necessary, to improve their techniques and skills.
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