How to Motivate Someone to Change

Important: GDPR Email Preferences

As you may already know, the EU General Data Protection Regulation (GDPR) will be coming into effect on 25th May 2018. We take your privacy seriously and we are working hard to ensure we comply with the new data protection laws. You can find out more about how we're doing this in our privacy policy on our website.

We want to make sure you continue to receive the latest newsletters, blogs, special offers and more.

As someone who has opted-in to receive our emails in the past, we’d like to give you this opportunity to confirm what you wish to receive:

Just so you know, if you don’t let us know what kinds of emails you want to receive from us, we’ll stop emailing you on the 24th May 2018 - you'll be missing out!

You are of course free to change your mind at any time – just follow the link at the bottom of any of our emails.

Advert

How to Motivate Someone to Change

To motivate people to change, use the Pleasure / Pain Questioning Technique (PPQT).

In order to motivate change in someone, ask these two questions and try to get multiple answers to each. The more answers to each question you can get, the better this technique will work to persuade others to change.

1. What are the LONG-TERM painful consequences you will suffer if you don't change (ie keep doing it)?
2. What are the LONG-TERM pleasurable benefits you will enjoy if you do change?

Ask these questions, in the order given, (PAIN then PLEASURE) and get as many answers as you can for both questions.

Here are some examples of how you might use this technique:

Imagine you want someone to stop over-spending.

What are the LONG-TERM painful consequences you will suffer if you keep spending more money than you earn?

What are the LONG-TERM pleasurable benefits you will enjoy if you spent slightly LESS than you earned, and invested a little, every month?

Imagine you want someone to stop over-eating.

What are the LONG-TERM painful consequences you will suffer if you keep overeating; consuming more calories than you need?

What are the LONG-TERM pleasurable benefits you would enjoy if you controlled your intake, so you were consuming slightly fewer calories than you need?

Imagine you want someone to stop talking too harshly.

What are the LONG-TERM painful consequences you will suffer if you keep talking to people so harshly that they don't want to work with you?

What are the LONG-TERM pleasurable benefits you would enjoy if you moderated your communication style, softened your approach, so that people would be very happy to work with you?

The pleasure pain principle.

The important thing to remember about people, is they tend to avoid pain and move towards pleasure.

So, you need to associate PAIN with not changing, and associate PLEASURE with making the change.

But you cannot tell them, you must ASK them.

• If you TELL them, they will fight you.
• If you ASK them the right questions, they will persuade themselves.

The moral of the story is: Learn and apply the Pleasure Pain Questioning Technique.

Blogs by Email

Do you want to receive an email whenever we post a new blog? The blogs contain article 5-10 minutes long - ideal for reading during your coffee break!

Your Comments

Further Reading in Motivation

• How to be Happy and Successful
  In order to be happy and successful, you need balance in your life. Your life is made up of different parts, and each part has to be in a harmonious relationship with the others, otherwise your life will become unbalanced.
  Read Article >
• How to make 2019 Your most successful year
  Are you ready to make 2019 your best year ever? We have put together eight fantastic tips to help you achieve this goal.
  Read Article >
• How to be More Fun
  Nobody likes being round a grump. Being fun is a trait most people appreciate in others. Obviously, there is a time and a place, but on the whole you can develop a fun attitude that will give you joie de vivre (or the "joy of living").
  Read Article >
• Make 2017 a Terrific Year for You and Your Family
  How to make 2017 the best year ever, for you and your family with these five steps.
  Read Article >
• How to feel positive and happier
  Take your first steps to greater happiness. Learn how to be more positive, by taking control of your mind and directing your thoughts towards the present time and visions of a better future, and by setting yourself worthwhile, achievable goals.
  Read Article >