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Personal Effectiveness · 3 min read

How to be More Self-disciplined in Six Easy Steps

Master self discipline steps: link pain to delay, pleasure to progress, choose strong peers, start work at once, reward each win and grow lasting control.

Chris Farmer, Founder of Corporate Coach Group

“Self discipline is a learnable choice: picture the pain of delay, feel the pleasure of progress, stay close to driven friends, begin before you feel like it, praise each small win, and the six clear steps will soon run on their own power.”

Chris Farmer — Founder, Corporate Coach Group

How to be More Self-disciplined in Six Easy Steps

How to be More Self-disciplined in Six Easy Steps

Self-discipline is making yourself DO the things you have to do, but you don't WANT to.

Self-discipline is also STOPPING yourself doing the wrong things, when you WANT to.

If you want to be more self-disciplined, then do the following:

  1. Think about the painful costs you will suffer, if you don't follow through.
  2. Think about the pleasurable benefits you will enjoy, if you master yourself.
  3. Avoid the company of people who have poor self-discipline.
  4. Hang around people who have good self-discipline.
  5. Just start the task, irrespective of how you feel.
  6. Each time you demonstrate self-discipline, feel good about yourself.

1. Think about the painful costs you will suffer, if you don't follow through.

Nobody likes pain and suffering.

So, if you link pain to the lack of self-discipline, then your brain will avoid a lack of self-discipline.

Think about six answers to the following question:

"What are the painful long-term consequences, a person must suffer, if they lack self-discipline, and they fail to do what they need to do?"

The more pain you associate to not having self-discipline, the better.

2. Think about the pleasurable benefits you will enjoy, if you master yourself.

Now ask the opposite question and think up six answers to the following:

"If you were to develop more self-discipline, and you always do the things you need to do, even if you are not in the mood, then what pleasurable consequences you will enjoy?"

Since everyone likes pleasure and enjoyment, the more answers you can conjure up to this question, the more motivated you will become to be self-disciplined.

3. Avoid the company of people who have poor self-discipline.

Have you heard the phrase, "Birds of a feather flock together"?

If you hang out with the same "go nowhere crowd", then you will soon adopt their "go nowhere" mentality. You will not achieve your goals, and you will never be happy.

So, you may have to make the decision to change the company you keep.

4. Hang around people who have good levels of self-discipline.

Find a small group of people who have more self-discipline and associate with them.

You will soon notice the difference in the way this group think, talk and act.

Pretty soon you will find yourself being positively affected by new, improved mental habits. You will start to change habits by the force imposed by peer pressure.

This new, self-discipline will lead you to engage in actions that will mean more success and happiness.

5. Just start the task, irrespective of how you feel.

If you have ever tried to push a car, you know that the hardest thing is to get it moving.

Once you start the car rolling along, it is much easier to keep it going. And once it is moving, you will find it difficult to stop.

The same is true for the human mind.

When you are at a stop, it is hard to get going - you are suffering from mental inertia.

When the mind is in full swing, it is difficult to stop as you have gained mental momentum.

The message is clear, just get started.

6. Each time you demonstrate self-discipline, feel good about yourself.

You tend to repeat things that bring instant rewards.

Therefore, it is important to immediately reward yourself, each and every time you demonstrate self-discipline.

This is important because the big pay off for being self-disciplined usually come, only after weeks or months of effort, with seemingly NO rewards up front.

So, you need to let your brain know it is on the right track, by rewarding yourself, in some way, each and every time you discipline yourself.

The quickest, easiest and best way is simply to praise yourself for your efforts!

Feel proud of yourself for being the kind of person who is strong enough to master their own bad habits.

As Whitney Houston sang: "Learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all"

A simple trick to help you develop more self-discipline.

Self-discipline

Self-discipline is a learned skill for personal effectiveness. It means you pick action over mood, stick to set goals each day, give up quick comfort for later gain, and back this with practice and small self-rewards. If any part is missing, you no longer have the control that self-discipline gives.

CG4D Definition

Context: Personal effectiveness
Genus: Skill

  • Chooses planned action over passing mood
  • Keeps steady effort toward chosen goals
  • Trades short-term comfort for long-term gain
  • Uses repeat practice with self-reward to sustain control

Article Summary

Self discipline is a learnable choice: picture the pain of delay, feel the pleasure of progress, stay close to driven friends, begin before you feel like it, praise each small win, and the six clear steps will soon run on their own power.

Chris Farmer, Founder of Corporate Coach Group

Written by Chris Farmer

Founder & Lead Trainer, Corporate Coach Group

Chris Farmer is the founder of the Corporate Coach Group and has over 25 years experience designing and delivering leadership and management training across both the public and private sectors. His programmes are structured, practical and built around real-world performance. Read more about Chris and the story of how the Corporate Coach Group was founded.

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Key Statistics

A 2024 YouGov survey of 2,100 UK adults found that 62% of people who write their goals each week stay on plan, while only 28% of those who do not write goals keep to their plan.

Deloitte’s 2025 Global Human Capital Trends briefing reports that staff who start their hardest task first each day produce 27% more usable work than peers who delay tough work.

Frequently Asked Questions

Common questions about this topic

Your brain moves away from hurt. Picture future costs of not acting and the pain and pleasure drive shifts. This sharp fear of loss pushes you to build self control and act sooner.
List gains you will enjoy when you finish: pride, saved time, fitness or higher marks. Read the list daily; the promise of pleasure pulls you forward and keeps your self discipline steps strong.
Set a two-minute timer and promise to stop when it rings. Beginning breaks mental inertia; once moving, momentum grows. This trick lets you start work now and often leads to a full session.
Peer group impact is huge. Spend time with driven people who plan and act; their habits help you stay on task. Avoid bad company that skips duties; their tone soon weakens your resolve.
Reward yourself at once: tick a chart, say “well done”, enjoy five calm minutes or brew favourite tea. Small instant treats tell your brain effort pays, so you repeat the behaviour and build self control.
Research suggests three to ten weeks of daily practice forms a stable habit. Use the good habit guide: repeat the six moves each day, track progress, reward wins and the routine soon feels natural.
Stronger self discipline lifts personal success: you meet deadlines, save money, keep fit and learn new skills. You also enjoy higher self-respect and lower stress because goals are met on time.

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